Contrary to popular belief that emotional or domestic abuse victims are a target because they are weak and spineless creatures, they are a target for many good qualities and strength they possess. These strengths, when overused inevitably become weaknesses that make them susceptible to manipulation and control and consequently keep them in abusive relationships, fighting to preserve what never existed in the first place.
Why am I a target for abuse?
Let us Have a Look at Why You Were a Target For Abuse.
You are “naive and trusting” and have no clue that most people, walking the face of the earth, have the capability to abuse or to treat another individual with disrespect and so much contempt. You project your empathetic and considerate personality onto the people around you with the expectation of being treated the same way you treat them.
You remain “hopeful” even in the face of severe mental and verbal abuse that there is still some amount of humanity left in the abuser and that one day they will wake up and realise their mistakes, be genuinely sorry and make amends.
“It takes EXTREME circumstances like being exposed to a narcissist to for a naive person to wake up to the realisation that there are people walking the face of the earth with pepper in their hands looking for unsuspecting victims to smear it on.”
You are “responsible, committed, dependable and a person of integrity.” Committed to seeing whatever they start to finish, your word is your bond. These qualities are why it is often easy for the narc to avoid responsibility. They are confident that you will step up to the challenge and even go as far as taking responsibility for their behaviour and attempt to make changes for the narc. You go as far as taking responsibility for the emotional state of other people. These are self-sabotaging behaviour that makes you a target for reverse psychology.
You are “empathetic, intuitive and sensitive” to the emotional environment around you, and you know how to adjust your approach accordingly. You can sense the needs of the people around you and are gifted to reading non-verbal cue of your nearest and dearest. Because they are compassionate by nature, you are driven to meet those needs without being asked or told.
You are “open-minded and allow yourself to be vulnerable“. You understand that vulnerability is essential to facilitating trust in relationships, so you share without realising that every information you let out will be twisted and used against you.
You are “forgiving, patient, long-suffering and resilient”. Only a resilient person can withstand the verbal onslaught of a narc. You forgive, and forgive and keep forgiving even the most inhuman treatment, believing that the best is yet to come and that one day they will come around.
While it’s okay to give your all to ensure the success of your relationship, it is worth noting that loving requires wisdom.